Info For Teens
Ask the Experts
I realized i was Bi-sexual a few months ago. I told some of my good friends. I havnt told my parents yet. I like this guy in my class but am to afraid to tell him because I am not sure if he is gay/bi.
One way to feel out whether or not a person likes you back (regardless of gender or sexual orientation) is by showing, not telling. Talk to him after class, try to make him laugh, etc. Show him, without being aggressive, that you’re paying attention. If he acts similarly friendly and warm towards you, that could be a good sign.
The only way to know for sure if the guy you like is gay or bisexual is to ask him. But there are a couple really important things to keep in mind. It’s important to think about whether you feel safe and comfortable with being out at school, because if you ask him out or show interest in him, he may tell other people that you’re bisexual. Also, asking someone who isn’t out whether or not they’re gay or bisexual can put a lot of pressure on them. Some people are comfortable talking about this stuff, and some aren’t. So keep in mind that this is a conversation that could make him feel uncomfortable, regardless of his sexual orientation.
If you decide that you feel safe coming out to him, you can try telling him that you’re bisexual and see how he reacts. Talking to him about it can help you get a sense of his comfort level with the topic, and it also gives him an opportunity to come out to you if he’s comfortable with it. It’s important to pay attention to his reactions – what he says and what his body language says — and to back off if you think he’s getting uncomfortable or upset.
Aside from the issue of figuring out this guy’s sexual orientation, keep in mind that anyone — gay, bisexual, or straight — who asks someone out runs the risk of being rejected. It’s up to you to decide if you’re willing to take that risk.